Flyover

as for the sports meet, all i got was a silver in high jump. but i enjoyed it a lot. the high jump particularly was quite… abnormal… all those who saw me participating would know.

what happened during the week after it got over is highly classified information, and shall not reveal it on this blog… it happened so… quickly… and certainly, full credit for this goes to itika… though i aint sure whether it happened for the good or not. i feel… weird.

then the following weekend, we guys went to jaipur… on an official class trip, first time ever in the history of our insti. 33 students came, the rest stayed back coz of multiple reasons… but what fun it was! we went on Friday night (9:30 p.m.), and got back on Tuesday morning at 6 a.m., after many sleepless nights. I attended the physio practical from 9 to 11, but then gave up and went home and slept. The next day had anatomy sub stage, so studied for that. Then slept and slept and slept.

Didnt play holi… Didnt feel like it… Though, later, felt bad abt missing it, so will certainly play next year. Read Atlas Shrugged instead… Have been really enjoying it so far. Then studied again for the physio exam today, and i am quite proud of the self control i showed yesterday… exam was ok-ok. right now i just want to drink milk and sleep…

am rusting… plentiful energy, no time.

track events tomorrow and the day after… and i am quite nervous… have always been very nervous abt races and stuff… they get so tiring, and then there is always the fear what if i get the urge to give up… which i will, as always… and which i’ll have to fight as always. i’ll try to remember 2 things:
1. use your height to your best advantage
2. do or die

it has been almost 5 years since it first happened, and there is absolutely no reason why i should keep killing myself over it, when no other person even cares… have had enough, and have had no response, so its high time i channelize my energies in some other direction… and here’s another promise, i am not going to show any further “stupidity” as far as this particular thing is concerned. i mean… seriously… have had enough.

its like… you think you are someone and then you see yourself helplessly being led by the tide… being someone you never thought you would be, someone you never wanted to be… and then, as now for me, you start hating yourself for the way you are becoming… and you want to be back to what you were, what you’ve always been. and i sure hope, and promise, rather, that i wont be what i dont want to be.

none of us was in a mood to study, naturally, and so anuj got up and gave a sort of lecture on urbanization, and then we were all interrupting him, and having a lot of fun… and then suddenly he was like, “mam lets have kalyani continue it further… she has done some good research on urbanization.” (for everybody’s info, i have done no such thing.)… so i was called forward (though i denied having done any such thing… it was all nice and funny, and jolly, and the teacher was unable to hear my voice and i sportily complied)… and again people started having fun, and itika’s voice was very conspicuous, so i said, “me and itika co-authored the research paper… we would both like to speak on it.” then itika was called forward… and i said a couple of lines abt evolution of cities and fossa dixitalis ( )… and then the teacher was like: “so tell me more about your research.”. and we both started off that it wasn’t a proper paper… just a “little” article on evolution of urban areas, needs, co-relation with socio-biology, changing pressures, evolutionary, ecological analogies, changing face of medicine, requirements etc… and so on and so forth. and in the end she was like: “get this paper in the next class… i would have the hod read it.”

guess would just write something abt it now… not a very difficult topic…

i remember june, july last year… the way i had gorged on pizzas and burgers, and had started off my days with glasses of coke and LOTS of cheese, and lots of cream, and coke, and ice cream during lunch and dinner… and had weighed a bare 53kgs with a height of 170-171 cms… without ANY exercise… and then, when i entered college, i gained around 7 kgs in 2-3 months… so had tried a bit to diet… but had failed brilliantly for a quite a long time… but then something really major happened. some PGI research students came to our college, and wanted to collect our blood samples and stuff, for vit D and Ca measurements… and also took our weights and mine came out to be 61.5. which was the absolute limit… i lost all taste for all junk food… its absolutely torturous for me to eat even a samosa… and my liking for exercising and sports increased TREMENDOUSLY… and though i dont get so much time for it, but I really make a lot of effort to take out some somehow… and i am so so so proud of my new found food habits… i mean, its pretty incredible…