Flyover

when do we remember our friends the most?

i do, when i am happy. and i need to share this happiness with someone.
or when i am sad suddenly.

but when we have relatively long sad phases, many of us (including self) try to avoid friends. perhaps because prolonged sadness alienates friends, and usually there is nothing anyone can do about the cause of your sadness. you have to get over it yourself.

and no, i ain’t sad. it’s just something i happened to be thinking of.

and while you are at it, solve the monty hall problem, courtesy sandeep.

and while i am at it, it’s nice being friends with sandeep.

seeking help from someone is an extremely, extremely private act. its like you are exposing yourself to that person and making yourself vulnerable. and if you take the huge step of seeking help, that means you trust the person, really like her, and want to strengthen the friendship. and that person might be nice enough to help you, furthering your belief that she is friendship-worthy.

but this personal act of seeking help demands reciprocation. you have to know that that person likes you too. if that other person never seeks YOUR help, or shares her personal life with you in some other way, you lose your ability to share with her. and you have this huge mental block. that person becomes unapproachable, unavailable. you may still like that person, but this time, there is a conversion from friends to acquaintances.

this happening yet again. the last few lines actually.

this was supposed to be the last of my concerns… i mean, X was supposed to help, not make things worse. i dont know why i even bother… i cant handle the whole attitude, especially since it appears to be specially targeted at me. i used to really like X… the only person who ‘was’ always that nice. but it’s just not the same anymore… what it has come down to is this- anything less than perfect and X disappears. you are not supposed be THAT casual with previously happy friendships. and if and when X feels like getting back, maybe i would not be so friendly… get lost, for all i care.

i cant believe i dedicated a WHOLE post to that nut/jerk. maybe i’ll always care… its not easy to give up.

huh.

terribly terribly wrong… i cant make anything out of it… what’s wrong with me? where’s all the motivation, the ambition, the craziness, the everything… and why is there is such a cold fog everywhere… i must bear the consequences of my mistake… but i wish, really really wish, that no one else had to.

help me, please.

i didnt know i was the possessive type, untill i just realised it. or maybe i am not… its just that over the past few months i have been realising that X (a used-to-a-be-very-very-good-friend, and, hopefully, still-a-friend) never thought i was his good friend, and people who came “after” me, became much better friends of X’s than i apparently could… it makes me feel a little insecure, frankly… like it did a bit with MB… but with X the degree of shock is greater, and hence the hurt is more.

me, akanksha, manpreet, itika, ishita, all went to navni’s place yesterday evening… for cooking food and eating it. i was co-hod dessert. here are the pics:

Manpreet reading a novel, and cut veggies on the table.

Navni HOD cooking

Desperate housewives

Ishita looking for dessert recipes

Mushrooms

Itika HOD strawberries

With sincerity and dedication

Navni tasting the iced tea

… aur CR banne ke baad (courtesy aks)

busybees

pasta in making

almost done

ready

nacho salad

white sauce pasta

bhukkad

strawberry hide and seek

dracula

manpreet cutting the cake in heart shape

Basically our menu was: iced tea, nacho salad with salsa sauce, white sauce pasta, strawberry hide and seek cake and fruit cream. There were minor glitches though- tea was slightly less in iced tea, salt a bit on the higher side in pasta, sugar syrup a bit too much on the cake. But overall, it was great.

What to say abt her? There is no one like her… absolutely no one… no one with her energies, with her incredible ability to get into controversies, with her mysterious exam-taking skills, with her restlessness, with her liveliness, with her stupidity, with her indefatiguability while talking on the phone and shamelessly reach unspeakable telephone bills, with her blind loyalty, her capacity to sacrifice for the ones she truly cares for, her resourcefulness as a “spy”, her child-ish reproaches, excited dancing, her devil-may-care attitude at times, her own world… she’s a master piece, a unique creation, a weirdo to the core, who believes firmly and truly that she is the normal-est person on earth, a F-A-N-T-A-S-T-I-C friend, a baby at heart, an idiot no. 1…

Since we got to know each other (in Jan, 2006), we have had so many long phone convos abt stereoisomerism, people, boys, our lives, mistakes, fears, ideologies, interests, etc. (and certainly she’s the person single handedly responsible for my GREATLY magnified ability to talk telephonically), such amazing slumbers, movie marathons, endless gossip sessions, so many fights, study sessions, bonding moments…

Am not being very good with words right now, but, well… I love her SO much, I owe SO much to her, and she’s SO SO SO important to me…

And here’s wishing her a huuuuuuuuuge HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! You’re legally adult now, baby!